The Sandwich Generation

They are called the Sandwich Generation. Adults who, no matter what their expectations, have their lives disrupted by the need to care for both their parents and children at the same time. It can be brought on by something sudden like a stroke or begin with a little assistance that grows into a greater commitment as a parent becomes increasingly fr

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Building Bridges

Before my father’s death, I journeyed back home to try and put things right with him. While we were each certain of the other’s love, there had been a long standing gap between us. In the last decade, we had only seen each other a few times and rarely spoke. Arriving at the nursing home, I found him weak and heavily sedated. So, I set aside what I

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Getting and Giving Hugs

For many of us, retirement marks the beginning of the end of the affirmation and encouragement which had sustained us throughout our professional lives. These “hugs” came in the form of pats on the back, laughs at our jokes, bonuses and congratulations from the boss, and the simple courtesies of the workplace. They are part of what made our working

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Aging in Place and Choices for Care

Choices for Care is Vermont’s effort to improve and increase the options available to Medicaid and medically eligible Vermonters. Gone are the days of being faced with either going to a nursing home or struggling on alone. For example, the program allows for patient direction about who should provide support. This includes the option to pay a famil

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Aging in Place in Reverse

It seems suddenly half the commercials and a lot of the news stories on TV are about reverse mortgages. As we live longer, healthier and more active lives, more retirees are considering reverse mortgages to help them remain in their homes. For people who have worked hard to stay out of debt, this can feel like going in reverse. What exactly is a re

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Aging in Place Takes Change

One of the greatest challenges aging presents may be the changes forced upon us. This is doubly so since many of us are less inclined to embrace change the older we get. We all know someone who won’t use an answering machine, but worries about missed calls. Or a widow or widower who insists on banking where they and their spouse did, even though th

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Caring to Age in Place

Roselyn Carter said, “There are for kinds of people: those who provide care, those who have provided care, those who will provide care and those who need care.” The issues of caring are universal; they touch everyone eventually. Caring can feel like a hardship. Whether one is receiving or giving, it can lay heavily. For one side there are demands o

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Aging in Place Takes Tough Love

Aging in Place means taking the long view. After all, we are talking about the rest of our lives; for most people that’s longer than anticipated. For many of us, our retirement years will exceed our working years. At some point, time can force choices about money. This is not just a financial problem; it often creates a challenge of values. Most of

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Women and Aging in Place

On many levels, Aging is Place is women’s work. Because they outlive men, a wife is often the caregiver for her husband. Left alone when he passes, her care is usually provided by a daughter. In between providing care for him and needing care from her is often a period of years spent struggling on a reduced income. According to the Society of Certi

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